Like a hemorrhoid

This morning I was reading the shooting script of The People VS. Larry Flynt… Here’s an excerpt that I liked:

Larry squirms nervously.

LARRY: Jeez, I dunno, Althea. All of a sudden you’re really puttin’ the screws on me.

ALTHEA (sincere) : Look, after my parents, I didn’t think I’d ever want to get married. But then I met you.

LARRY (staring into her eyes) : So you’re really serious…?

ALTHEA: Like a hemorrhoid.

Larry slowly nods, mulling this over.

She waits for a response.

Finally — he smiles slyly.

LARRY: Ummm, Althea?

ALTHEA (grinning expectantly) : Yes, Larry……..?

LARRY: Would you be my wife?

Althea SQUEALS happily and hugs him. They kiss excitedly.

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